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Friday, December 31, 2010

Wonderful 2010.....Greater 2011!

In a few hours lagi, dah bye-bye 2010, welcome 2011. Meaning that, there's a lot of things in the to-do list. I dah taknak buat new year resolution sbb dah tau sgt pe nak jadi. So, just ade to-do list (tak same ke?). Ok la, first of all, tahniah lagi kat Khairul Fahmi sbb dia ramai plak yg tgk blog ni sbb ade muka dia. Tumpang publisiti cket ye.



Ok la, back to the to do list. First, yang wajib diselesaikan ialah proposal, questionnaires and research analysis, siapkan thesis by the end of 2011 sbb nak konvo ujung tahun 2012. Nak tak nak, it's a must la kan. Next, duit utk pergi bersuka ria di Korea kena dah ada sbb finally nak beli tiket flight and wat passport! Yes! Can't wait for that.


Tadi tgk Oprah, ada cita pasal sorang wanita ni dari negara Zimbabwe, tak dapat nak belajar tapi tak give up and finally tak lama lagi dah nak dapat PhD. Aku? Orang bagi peluang, tak reti la nak gunakan elok-elok, main-main. Selalu aku rasa research ni satu beban, sambung belajar pun susah bukan sebab apa, tapi M.A.L.A.S! Penyakit ni memang deadly btol. Mau leh give up kalo layan lebih-lebih. So, disebabkan peluang yang ada ni jadi aku bertekad (semangat nih!) akan terus belajar sampai ke peringkat paling tinggi. That means bila dah abis my Masters degree ni, sambung lagi untuk PhD. I dah tak kesah dah kalo lambat kahwin ke, tak kahwin ke sbb bnda tu semua kan mmg dah ditentukan. Yang penting, kita sebagai manusia ni kena ambil peluang yang ada and guna sepenuhnya.


Setiap benda yang kita buat ada kesusahannya tersendiri, terpulang kita jugak cam mana nak handle. If you believe in yourself, you'll always win. We human, never know what we can do as we always stop ourselves from achieving greater things in life.


I want to do this thing because of me, myself. I believe that I can do it and I'm the best. To you also, the reader, do believe in yourself. You don't need a miracle because you yourself are magic!
Have a nice year ahead and let's work hard to make our wishes and dreams come true! Owh, one more thing, that means I'm 23 next year. Although I hate being older day by day but I love the number 23! Yes, goodbye girl, hello matured woman.




I have a wonderful 2010. How about you?
I look forward to more wonderful things in 2011!

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Congrats!

First of all, macam rakyat Malaysia yang lain, aku nak wish congratulations utk team bola sepak kita. Memang fantastik abis game korang! Patut la tetiba si Khairul Fahmi tu femes overnight. Dulu minat Christiano Ronaldo, tapi sekarang dah tak pandang sebab kempen beli barangan Malaysia, jadi I decide pilih Khairul Fahmi plak. (Khairul tu barang ke? Ehehe....alasan je tu). Ok2, sebelum ada orang marah, baik kita clearkan situasi ni ok? 'I' yang dimaksudkan tu bukan la saya ye, tetapi fenomena yang melanda banyak gadis2 remaja (remaja ke?) sekarang ni. Takde dah gambor Brad Pitt kat dinding, beli paper tampal muka si Khairul tu byk2. Pastu ckp kat mak, "Mak, ni gambor menantu mak!". Pastu kena pelangkung sbb gatal. Haha. Ok. Tak boleh salahkan dorang jugak. Memang si Khairul tu penyelamat team kita. So, terima je la ok. Yang lain pun hebat gak, kalau takde yang lain, tak menang la jugak kan. Pape pun, tahniah Malaysia! Good games....



Pujaan Malaya ni!
Credit



Jangan time ni je korang puji melambung2, bila kalah kutuk abis-abis. Kita kena continue support team sendiri, jangan time down, korang pun ikot downkan dorang. Jangan time ni je ngaku rakyat Malaysia. Renung-renungkan la ok? Isu Indonesia tu pulak, no comment la kan. Kadang2 memang ada orang yang obses, biasa la kan. Yang penting, tak payah la nak gaduh2, kita kan jiran. Yang penting, semangat kesukanan tu!




p/s: Khairul 21, aku 22.....patut la terasa dah tua diri ni! Byk pulak manusia yg lagi muda dari aku! Nasib la aku tak minat yang muda, kalo tak, bleh jadi pujaan hati gak ni.

Monday, December 20, 2010

Nothing

The last person to hurt you apologizes, do you accept?
Yes, why not. People are not perfect, we apologizes and move on with life.

Last person you kissed calls you, what do you say?
Never been in this situation really.

Do you pass out at the sight of blood?
Nope, why should I be.

Is there anyone you couldn’t live without?
My family and friends. Typical answer. I know.

What are you planning on doing after this?
Going to the office asking for confirmation on thesis submission date. And secret recipe!

Have you ever slapped someone?
Yes. I'm young and hot-blooded you know.

Will tomorrow be better than today?
I always wish it is.

Have you ever had a best friend of the opposite sex?
I'm not sure if we can be consider as best friend.

What is worse, physical or emotional pain?
Emotional pain of course. You'll never know when it's gonna heal.

When’s the last time you had a real smile on your face?
Just now.

Whose car were you in last?
My housemate. I drove it to the faculty as she's not confident on driving it during rain.

How long is your hair?
Somewhere in the middle.

Last movie you watched?
Lemony Snickett Series of Unfortunate Events. So last season. I know. I'm bored.

Who were you with?
Erin, my housemate and the owner of the car.

Last thing you drank?
Plain water. Good for health.

Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours?
Nichkhun and Taecyeon of 2PM of course! Those boys are hot!

Have you ever seen a dead body?
I can't really remember. Maybe.

How long do you think you will live?
If I know, I wouldn't be answering this.

Person you want to talk to?
My ehem.....we're history. But I've a lot to say to him.

What was the first thing you did this morning?
Take a bath.

The color of carpet in your bedroom?
Background is green with a picture of cartoon car garage.

Last person you went out to dinner with?
Eza and Mai.

Are you spoiled?
no. not really.

Do you drink lots of water?
Yup.

How do you vent your anger?
Yelling and throw stuff away. Typical movie things.

Who was the last compliment you received from?
Eza. She compliment everybody a lot.

When was the last time you threw up?
I don't remember.

What theme does your room have?
Purple. I made my mum choose it.

Are you a mama’s child or a daddy’s child?
Both. I can't really choose between them.

Would you ever join the military?
Nope. Not interested in army either.

The last website you visited?
UiTM library portal for journal I supposed to read.

Who was the last person you took a picture with?
My family. On my graduation day.

Last person you went to the movies with?
Atip kot.

Today, would you rather go back a week or go forward a week?
Forward a week. I'll be home. But at that time, I wanna go back a week so I stayed with my family.

What are you looking forward to right now?
Be home!

Is it hard for you to get over someone?
Yup. I still remember every single thing about us. It's pathetic.

Do you get along with boys?
Depends on what types of boys do you means.

Do you think you’ve changed over the past year?
Maybe not. I never really thought that I could change. I'm as lazy as ever!

How many chances do you tend to give people before enough is enough?
Never think about that one.

How late were you up last night?
1.20 am.

Do you believe in love?
Definitely.

Did you kiss or hug anyone at all today?
nope.

Song you wanna live in?
I don't know. Something with boy who loves you and have happy ending. I guess.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Mrs. Wanie? Maybe not yet....

I want to get married jugak, boleh tak mak?




Haih, looking at pictures of girls my age, exactly my age get married is somewhat makes me think that I'm a spinster. Owh god! That's bad. And I'm just 22. Not 32. I'm jealous. Seriously!




I know people said that getting married is hard work. Responsibilities. Endless fighting. Cooking. Babysitting (husband, I mean....). Nagging. Mess. etc etc......but it is still a beautiful thing rite? Well, at least it is to me. This is the part where people will say "You're not married yet, so you can say that, wait till you already are and you'll see!"


I have a dream of having a family of my own and I'll be a full time housewife. I'll devoted my time for my family. Owh sweet! Maknanya, I'll find someone rich, so that I don't have to work!


What? I'm studying hard enough now just to end up being a housewife? Don't worry, it is still too early to know what will happen in the future. It's just a plan.


It's just a dream of mine. To prepare breakfast for them in the morning, sent them to school. Wait for my husband to come home. Help my kids with their school works. Tuck them in at night. And gardening together on the weekend. We'll have a nice house with a beautiful garden. That's perfect! Not to mention the fish pond. I like that too.






Told you I'm a typical girl. Outdated. So last century. Name it. It's me. And I'm happy in my world.

The girl

In life, there's always times when you feel down, giving up and just don't wanna think about anything. I guess it is normal. Sometimes, I hope that people can understand me better, can read my mind and my heart so that they will not misunderstood me. Hope is such a big word for me. Since I was a little girl, hope is the burden I've been carried around with me until now. Failure is my enemy, in whatever I do, I must be among the best. It is like a repeated tape playing in my head over and over again.


But sometimes, at a time, it is just too much. If I fail, let me fail. I'll fight back. I'm not a loser. I don't give up. That's what I've been trained all this while. The only thing that can stop me moving forward is myself. It's hard to struggle with yourself everyday. It's like a fight that sometimes tired me and makes me feel that everything is just so worthless. I hope you'll understand what I feel, the burden in me, the pressure I've been holding all this while.


I'll finish what I started but please understand me. I'll decide for myself what I'll do in the future. It's time for me to take the responsibilities for what I did. Maybe I'm wrong but let me learn from my mistakes, it's a part of my journey of growing up. I might not be the best but I know that giving up is not gonna solve anything. I will not and I'll move forward.


You'll be proud, I promise you that but in the meantime let me be the 22 years old girl I always want to be. This girl of yours will not let you down. Trust me.

Friday, December 17, 2010

random

Nad, curi dari blog u. Hehe...dont mind eh.


Instruction :
Once you are tagged , answer all the questions honestly . No lying or cheating :D

Starting time : 13.58 pm

Name : Nur Hazwani Mohammad Azam

Brother(s) : 2 lil brothers. One in high school, another 1 in uni.

Eye colour : dark brown under d sun.

Shoe size : perlu kah? teet!

Hair : somewhere in d middle

Piercings : yes. kat telinga time kecik2 dlu.

What are you wearing right now : slack, t-shirt karate club, tudung

Where do you live : As a student: shah alam, family: alor star

Favourite number : 5, 7, and 23

Favourite drink : sky juice.

Favourite breakfast : toast and half-boiled egg.


HAVE YOU EVER :

Broken a bone : nope

Been in a police car : yup...my dad amik kat shah alam bwk blk alor star ngan kete keje dia.

Fallen for a friend : yes!

Fallen for a guy/girl in a short period of time : urm.yes!

Swam in the ocean : tak blajar g berenang

Fallen asleep in school : jarang

Broken someone's heart : yes. and i'm really sorry.

Cried when someone died : depends on who died i guess

Save e-mails : sometimes

Been cheated on : urm....yup!

WHAT :

Your room look like : umah sewa: messy ngan journal berlambak2. home sweet home: messy jgk tp i like the room color!

What is right beside you : kerusi si suraya

What is the last thing you ate : chicken koktel

WHO :

Who did you last yell at? : mai, eza n erin. sbb menang main uno!

Who was the last person you danced with? : dancing? never...

Who last made you smile : takuya kimura.

FINAL QUESTION :

What are you listening to right now? : the sound of the fan. and it's raining. it's cold.

What did you do today? : surfing, blogging, watching drama and supposedly, repair my proposal.

Are you the oldest : exactly! i always want an older brother.

Indoors or outdoors : both

TODAY YOU DID :

Talk to someone you like? : no

Kiss anyone? : in dream, yes. real life, no.

Sing? : yup. lagu korea...tp xtau la sebutannya cena.

Talk to an ex? : no

Miss someone : always

Eat? : yup. everyday pun mkn what.

LAST PERSON WHO :

You talked to on the phone? : eza

Made you cry? : takuya kimura jgk.

You went to the mall with? : eza

Who cheered you up? : myself. i'm highly motivated.

HAVE YOU :

Been to Mexico? : no

Been to USA? : no

RANDOM :

Have a crush on someone : used to. but we're history.

What books are you reading right now? : categorical data analysis by alan agresti. buku statistik dowh! pening...

Best feeling in the world : out with him!

Future kids name? : girl : dah tak igt. mybe. alya or hani. ntah.

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? : you mean bubub and bear? yes. normally when i wake up, dorang dh jauh kna tendang.

What's under your bed? : i tdor atas lantai je.

Favourite sport(s) : karate? ohoo....rony!

Favourite place : home sweet home. and korea!

Who do you really hate? : someone. cant mention any names here.

Do you have a job? : if u consider being student is a work, then yes, i have a job.

What time is it now? : 2.15 pm

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

My notes of the day

Notes for the day:

1- Lecturers are exactly like us when they present their work, they have blank mind sometimes even the one with PhD and years of experience! That's normal...=))

2- Students under the same particular lecturer, does present the same exact ways everytime. It's like watching the same advertisement over and over again. The bored one to be precise, is it a norm or skill that they have?!!

3- I always have a thing for tall and fair guys. They sometimes tend to look a lil bit girlish but who cares! They're super cute and good looking especially the ones with spectacles and highly educated. The way they talk and the overflowing charisma is just so tempting! I got my eyes on someone..wink2~~

4- I guess that there's no way escape once you're in the academic area, research is just simply your best friend whether you like it or not. Yes, I love research!

5- It's easy to pay attention when there's a good looking guy explaining things and it makes you feel motivated also!


Ah, I'm just a typical girl anyway. I love things people normally love, nothing much. Maybe the only thing different is, I like lemon! No sugar please....ok, that's a crap.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

stalking!

Nanad is crazy with Ashraf Muslim!

Who doesn't?

I believe he will like your cupcakes

And skittles too!

I'm over excited plak...

Me? I like.....hmmmm

Mr. A was there, maybe I'll be waiting for Mr. B?

Or perhaps not, let's go with Mr. H instead

We have the same initial!

Yeah right Wanie...=P

You're my lucky number 23!

Sometimes it just amazing when you met someone with much similarities with you

When it is a super good looking guy

You will start to think....

Maybe we are fated to be together

Hahaha!! Nope!!

It just a coincidence

Things like that happens in life you know

Just something that makes you smile for a day!

Suddenly, I love number 23 bleh?

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Biology...genetic huh?

Come to think of it, I guess no matter how I think I hate study, doing research, reading journal, going to conference, that's what I'll end up doing for the rest of my life. I guess we never really know what's best for us, well it is for me. Seriously, I don't think I'll be going out from academic field no matter what. Unless I decided to be a full time housewife, which maybe I'll consider when I be a millionaire cause I don't wanna have a hard life if, I said if, doesn't mean I want it to happen which is divorce.

I guess I want to keep studying, maybe on different field. Biology and chemistry used to be my passion but since I'm no longer in a science stream, it just been forgotten. Maybe I can take up a degree on new course, biology or chemistry. Back on my first dream on becoming on....on...on what? I can't really remember but it has something to do with science. Maybe genetics, DNA is what I first read when I'm a little girl and even though I can't really understand it but I like it. Who knows what will happen in the future right? Who says that you can only stay in one stream, I'm maybe done my masters in agriculture marketing and economics but I know I can do well in biology as well. I should do it, right? Learning doesn't have limit, as long as you want to do it, you can.

Maybe there will be times when I find it hard but I don't think I regret it. I won't think about it anymore. Cause if I do, maybe I'll take it back. So just do it Wanie! Tapi wait another one and a half year, finish what you started first!


Never ever underestimate the power of your brain, we never used more than 2% of it anyways. Surely this brain of mine can do something spectacular! Ok, at least out of ordinary pun dah kira bagus. Haha....!


P/S: I got a new title for the research and I guess I can make it this time! Positively sure! My brain said so.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Superwoman vs Wonderwoman

Macam mana agaknya orang perempuan yang dah kawen, ada anak, sambil tu belajar wat Master and PhD? Banyak jugak yang aku dengar, boleh abis on time, cemerlang gemilang terbilang la pendek kata. Padahal ibarat kata member aku, memang rasa tak cukup je 24 jam ni! Tapi memang aku tabik la pada isteri2 dan ibu2 ni, memang superwoman! Lelaki sekalian, tolong ambik perhatian k.....kalo lelaki lain sikit kot, yelah, anak2 kecik bini yang handle, keje umah pun selalunya bini gak yang buat, mak mertua takde byk demand sgt kalo ngan menantu lelaki ni, so kalo belajar pun maybe tak sesusah yang perempuan kot....(kot la, aku pun xsure sgt).



Teringin nak tau sebenarnya cena dorang manage semua tu. Yang aku penah dengar citer, time siang bila anak2 dah bangun mmg tak boleh pegang thesis langsung, memang jadi fulltime housewife siapkan anak2, nak kemas umah, masak, bila malam semua dah tidor baru la boleh wat keje. Memang restricted la compare ngan kami2 ni yang ehem2, single. Agaknya bila dah jadi isteri and ibu je kot baru paham macam mana. Tapi utk my mother pun, even tak sambung belajar, tapi you still a superwoman! Love ya!!


So to all single ladies out there, not Mrs. yet and you're continuing your study, think bout it. Maybe we should get married first! Joking......manage your time properly people. 24 hours a day is not enough is not an acceptable excuse! Single ladies are more like wonder woman dari superwoman sebab asyik wondering....me, at least. Or maybe we should go with wonder girls?!!



Patut la research tak jalan, asyik duk nobody je! Patutnya nak jadi somebody....ceh!

Friday, December 3, 2010

It's my day!






Convocation is over. Dah abis benda yang ditunggu selama ni. For that few seconds on the stage, your moment where people look at you and you're officially graduates, it takes years of hard work. I hope my lil sis and bro learn a lot and take it as a motivator for them. I want to go to your convo too k!



Things get a lil bit chaotic that time. Imagine la when you have 1181 graduates at the same time, times ngan berapa org family member yang datang, plus hujan lebat, so yeah, I guess you guys get the picture. Sadly my bestie Sarah is not with me but it's ok, finally we still grad at the same time even not at the same place. To meet my former classmates especially ex-housemate where I spent 2 years of my degree years with them, we study together, we laugh and shed tears together and finally we make it. My success is not only my effort but them too. It's a gift not only for me but to you guys too! Thanx a lot!






To my parents for believing in me all dis moments. For all the times, money and pray from you guys to me. This is what I can give to you. The best present I could ever think of. Mum, dad....I love you guys so much, and this is for you.








UiTM, Universiti Teknologi Mara, ITM, whatever you wanna call it, I'm proud to be one of the alumni. Thank you so much to all my dear lecturers and my beloved university. The best in my heart indeed! UiTM dihatiku!!!

Friday, November 26, 2010

Convo?

Convocation is just around d corner! I can't believe it...at last after 3 tahun pya hard work (not really la), it comes to the day dat I dream of since in first semester lagi. Tapi ramai jugak member2 yang cakap, aku malas la nak g konvo, malas la itu, malas la ni...why? Kenapa tak nak? Kenapa malas? After all dis year study, at last receive jugak official scroll, at last dah ade degree. Cheer up guys! Agaknye aku je kot yang terlebih excited.

Malas nak tulis panjang2...blank idea tak tau nak tulis ape tapi excited nak jumpa mmber2 coursemate lama, bergosip2 mcm dulu.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Move on, it's your life Wanie.....

Then he's not worth it....

That's what my bestie tell me just now. I don't know, I just can't think bout it anymore. He's not the one to be blame. It's me, I guess I made him look like a bad guy. And he's not. He never done anything wrong to me. It's me who keeps fooling around and end up hurting myself like a stupid person.


He's someone in my life
He's someone in my heart
I guess that someone should be let go
Because he used to be someone to me
It's time for me to move on for that someone



I wish you all the best in your life. I'm sorry I don't want to try to forget you and cherish you in my heart always because that's the only way I can smile with the thought, "I love this guy for real and he's happy now so I should move on with my life now".

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

me.you.us

Time stops when I meet you. I want to believe it is a miracle. I miss you so much, seeing you makes my heart beats faster, everything else just doesn't matter anymore. Until now, I asked myself. Everything happen for a reason, and what is the reason for this? 4 years ago, I thought fate makes me choose you. I fall for you. Things happen. And after 2 years since the last time we saw and contact each other, I met you again. The same face, the very same person who teach me...



This is love.

I do believe in miracle!

Coincidence? Miracle? Fate? I believe in all of that. Meeting you tonight, I was struck. Never imagine that. My heart stop for a moment, I'm shaking, I'm dead nervous and I can't breathe. Why must I met you? It will only bring more pain to me and you, no....I don't know what you're thinking, I don't know what you feel. It suffocates me.



I don't want to see you

Not because I hate you

Not because I want to erase you

I'm scared that I miss you even more

I'm scared that I love you even more

I'm scared of everything



And tonight, of all the night, I've been waiting when it will happen. And seeing you, I'm speechless. You were there, looking as good as ever and I'm here still the same person.



And tonight I'm sure and when people asked me


Do you really love him?









I know the answer to it


Yes, I do.

And I miss you now.

Can't you just be a miracle and come back? I need you now.




I hate the pathetic me who always look back in my memories.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Nothing in particular

I envied football player

They get paid for playing around

And a lot too!


Can I do something like that?

Nah!

I'm born to study till the end~


And that is the best!

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Hmm.....

Kadang2 pelik jgk, terasa nak tau sapa la sebenarnya yang baca ape benda merapu yang aku tulis kat sini. Teringin jugak nak tau even takde banyak mana pun, 2 3 orang je. Selain member yang mmg tau aku ada blog, sapa lagi yang baca? Dia ke? Awak ke?

Apa agaknya orang fikir? Teringin gak nak tau tapi bila dipikir balik, better tak payah tau la kan. Everyone has their own opinion and thought. And as for me, apa yang aku tulis, cuma apa yang terlintas waktu tu, apa yang aku rasa.

Entah la apa aku merapu malam2 ni. Mata pun dah ngantuk, dah berat, esok banyak plak aktiviti kat Intekma tu, so tdor r. Owh elaun, cepat la masuk k, dah kering sangat ni. Daa~

p/s: Aku benci Tonton.com.my, cara baru tgk tv pala lutut! Lembap dowh. TV3...seriously?

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

And it's you again

There's something I always wanted to ask you but I'm scared, I don't wanna hear you saying what I don't wanna hear. How pathetic I am. It's been 2 years since I tried my very best to erase you, trying to divert myself, but now I know you're always there, inside of me. Deep down, maybe in my unconscious part of brain, I never forget you. It hurts, do you even know that? So hurt that I can't even cry it out, it breaks my heart everytime.

In my dreams, I asked you...what actually happen between us? And you answered back just by saying, "Do I know you?"

Why?

And yes, I guess now I can't lie to myself. I still love you, just the same as 4 years ago. When I was 18, I found you, my first love. I guess until now, it never changed, not even a bit cause it hurts the same.


And it's you.....MY3108


And I'm sorry that I love you. I wish it is a lie.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

New wishlist

Salam and hi.


Writing from Shah Alam...hmmm, after 6hoursof long drive from Alor Star, trus g ngajar tuisyen kat USJ. Balik dalam pukul 6setengah, singgah umah my cousin, antar ikan pekasam yg my aunt order kat my mum. Dia ajak g Damansara esok g birthday celebration of my cousin's son plus my other cousin. Ok je, makan free. Pastu trus g SACC g mkn kat my fave place, order the same menu. Went to Watson's bought some really need emergency things, g MPH bought CLEO just to flip through and CD store to fing my fave Japanese drama tapi xde. Satu lg, g Secret Recipe and got Chocolote Indulgence and Marble Cheesecake, syg my fave New York Cheesecake dah abis. Tiring? Nah....not really.


Just flip through CLEO td and surf the net and I decide I want this:


The price is under 100k, with all the package it offer, it worth it!


The bottle is so perfect! I love floral~


Is it really bad that I love pink? Gosh!

The later 2 tu boleh la beli dalam masa terdekat ni pas dapat elaun, tapi yang first tu rasanya nak kena keje bapa lama baru leh beli. Takpe2, keje 2 bln je dah boleh wat loan pe, boleh la tu. Dream keeps us motivated, yeah! And yes, I have a plan to change my life, and I hope it works. Plan pe? Nnt la I story, pas dah berjaya nnt k, kalo x....phm2 je la ye.

Dah ckup mengarut. Off to bed. Bye!

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Raya time!

Selamat hari raya! It's not too late g kan nak wish raya...Nway, I'm still at Ipoh, celebrating raya ngan family belah my father, ramai giler, maklumlah orang adik beradik ramai, and my dad plak yang bongsu so ramai la sepupu sepapat, anak2 buah yang dah lost count bape org. Kalo skip setahun, mau tak igt dorang sume ni, ye lah, dah tiap2 tahun bertambah je anak sedaranya...hehe.

Mmg fevret aku le kalo blk Ipoh ni, makan giler sedap2, asal datang umah sape2 je kompem balik kenyang. Duit raya pun byk sbb kitorang ni antara cousin yang plg muda so yang dah berkerjaya tu lagi ramai la tapi sedihnya dis year, duit raya aku mmg byk dah kena potong. Dah semua bising kat aku, "Kamu ni bilanya nak abih blajor? Tak boleh nak potong nama lg dari list neh, asyik bersambung2 je blajor, bila aku nak merasa duit raya kamu plak?" Haha!

Hoho..pakcik2 dan makcik2 ku sayang, udoh teman ni mmg suke bebenor blajor, xsanggup rasanya nak berenti. Ceh! Sebenornya muda lagi, baru 22, dah nak merasa gaji plg cket pun belas2 ribu, bior ler teman ni belajor tinggi2 dlu, ha lpas ni blajor sampai dapat doktor ler gayanya, professor ler katakan. Hahaha....tinggi benor citer2nye. Nnt I dah gaji belas2 ribu, aku bagi duit raya tiap2 bulan...ha, amacam? Mmg pemurah btol aku ni...kih3.....doa2 la ye~~

K la, penat meraban mlm2 ni, ckup ler tu. Nnt plak ye.....presentation proposal 23hb ni, fuhh!!!! Jampi2 la moga panel2 tu tak suh aku present blk, luluskan ler tajuk mike ni ye...

Friday, September 3, 2010

God did not create universe! It exist spontaneously!

God did not create universe! Because there is a law such as gravity, the universe can and will create itself from nothing. Spontaneous creation is the reason there is something rather than nothing, why the universe exists, why we exist," Stephen Hawking.

Kenal sape mamat si Stephen Hawking ni? Aku rasa ramai yg kenal, kalo tak kenal pun penah la dengar nama dia. Statement terbaru dalam buku dia yang kuar xlama lagi. Bijak dia ni tapi sayangnya tak nampak keagungan Tuhan yang ada dalam setiap kejadian. Agaknya dia ni suka main magic kot. Universe yang besar gedabak ni jadi secara spontan? Sapa plak yang jadikan graviti? Jadi secara spontan gak kot. Pergh! Aku pun bleh takat nak wat statement camtu. Semua yang dalam dunia ni jadi secara spontan. Magic! Tetiba bleh jadi. Sedangkan dalam Al-Quran tu dah tertulis setiap benda, setiap kejadian yang Allah ciptakan tu ada sebabnya. Hanya Allah yang boleh jadikan semua ni. Tapi sayang, ramai yang tak nampak, tak sedar even bijak pandai.

Mungkin aku bukan orang yang layak nak cerita pasal semua ni, aku pun tak sempurna, kadang2 tau bnda tu salah tapi buat jugak, tapi harap2nya aku berdoa selalu jangan aku jadi camni. Tak percaya kewujudan Tuhan, kebesaranNya......

Ya Allah, ya Tuhanku, sesungguhnya hanya Kau satu2nya Maha Pencipta. Hanya Kau yang berhak menciptakan dan memusnahkan sesuatu dan hanya padaMu aku berserah. Amin.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Merdeka!

Salam and hi.

Since hari ni merdeka, so every post yang aku tgk pun pasal merdeka. Nak wish jugak la, Happy 53rd Independence Day to our beloved Malaysia! Hopefully we will have a prosperous years ahead!!!

To my friends who celebrated their birthday today, Happy birthday guys! And yes, happy birthday to you too mr. past memories who I try so very hard to let go, have a wonderful years always and just be happy.

Happy merdeka to my thought of you....I'm more than happy now. Thanx.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Alone

Not planning to go back
Sick and tired of everything
and I stood there emotionless
Because I'm sick of myself
Pretending like I'm ok
Still smiling, faking it
I want to be with myself alone
where I don't have to face anything
I don't wanna hurt
and be hurt
So, just let me be
You'll never understand what I felt
but since I'm a friend
Let me swallow it and forget everything
And go back
That's what friend for
To accept all the bitterness of friendship
And forget about it
Only keep the happy moments
I'll do that
In a moment
Coz I need to find that friend-self in me

Sweet 17 dear sister!

Selamat hari lahir ke-17! Tak sangka pejam celik dah 17 dah adik aku yang sorang ni. Dah besar panjang, anak dara ni tapi aku tak penah rasa dia cam 17 tahun, mungkin sebab perangai terikut2 yang bongsu tu. Tulis kat cni pun bukannya dia boleh baca, tapi takpe la, sekadar mengingati pe yang perlu. Akak selalu doakan yang terbaik utk korang semua, moga2 jadi anak yang berguna la k! And wat yang terbaik utk SPM nnt. Hadiah? Hmmm.....tgk la cena...=))

Birthday girl in pink

And once again, I'm here alone at my beloved ex-faculty, continue to force and striving to finish my proposal not to mention to make it as best as I can in this short time. Kenapa alone? Itu lebih baik bila perlu ilham utk menulis. Tulis proposal pun kena ada ilham, baru flow ayat tu power. Hehe!

Sometimes, I prefer to be alone even though I'm not a lone ranger type of person. I love when there's many people with me, hate it when I'm being left alone but lately, I find my peace when I'm alone. Doing my things on my own. It is quite enjoyable I must say. Truth is, I'm not ok. My peace is not at home, but tense are. So, to stop the tense from annoys me, I decided to go out, far from everything.

There's only me, my song and my never ending proposal writing. This is my life.

Friday, August 27, 2010

giving up? I don't think so...

Hi and salam.

Sitting here alone in my beloved ex-faculty (since I've changed my faculty recently) with the coldness from the rain just now, it's relaxing. Suddenly, my mind become clearer and all the problems that haunt me lately seems to have an answer after all. Just a little push to boost up my spirit and I know I can do it, I always do.

I'm someone who work better in tense since that it push me forward and forcing my brain to find a solution, a good one of course. Now, I have tonnes of reading, highlighting and critical thinking to do but I don't feel like I'm in mess and I have a good feeling that I can finish it on time and satisfy my supervisor with it. This is good, at least I can write my best and prepare myself for the defense of proposal after Raya.

Now, I'm full of spirit and positive thinking. That's how everything works out for me! And giving up is a big no for me.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

give up or give it all?

Salam.

Terasa malas nak melangkah ke mana-mana, malas nak berjumpa dengan orang yang sepatutnya tapi perlu, dan sangat2 penting, jadi terpaksa memaksakan diri melangkah pergi. Haih. Penat memikirkan bnda yang sama setiap hari. Macam mana nak jadikan idup student ni gembira? Seems impossible sekarang.

Give up? Dah terlalu banyak kali aku fikirkan bnda yang sama. Dan terlampau tepu otak aku dengan perkataan dan niat utk mengalah. Tapi, tak pernah berani untuk mengalah, sebabnya? First, sekali aku dah melangkah, ini mmg takdir aku, teruskan walau macam mana susah sekalipun. Kedua, memikirkan orang tua di rumah, terbatal niat untuk mengalah, dan terus menggagahkan diri.

Apa erti gembira sebenarnya? Persepsi aku tentang gembira sangat melalaikan sebenarnya. Bersantai2 setiap hari, bangun lambat, bangun dengan senyuman sebab takde yg perlu difikirkan, tgk cerita, tgk wayang, pergi karoke, pendek kata, bersenang lenang la. Huh. Memang la susah cmtu. Hidup, biar apa pun yang aku buat sekarang, semuanya ada tanggungjawab, peranan yg perlu dimainkan dengan jayanya. Peranan aku sebagai pelajar, menyiapkan apa yang perlu, melalui apa yang harus dan wajib....akhirnya, kejayaan itu bukan milik orang lain, tapi diri sendiri jugak.

Kenapa ayat aku jadi camni? Entah.....malas nak fikirkan jawapannya. Dan sekarang, meja ni penuh dengan jurnal2 yang belum betul2 difahami. Mengeluh lagi. Dari mengeluh, baik start reading and finish it by the time given. But I'm sleepy.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Argh!!!!!!

Penyakit malas dah menjelma balik, ntah la, malas rasanya nak membaca research2 yang banyak ni. When time like this come, I started to doubt my decision bout continue my study. Haih! Apasal la malas sgt ni Wanie! Pick yourself up and just do what you need to do. I have to, really really have to do this. Kalo tak, xberaya la aku tahun ni. Tak abih2 cita isu yang sama kat sini, tak tau la bila masanya rajin tu nak datang and stay lama. Penat!

Plan esok....meet up with the supervisor, pastu sambung tgk You're Beautiful, hehe~ Update terbaru, baru baca emel tadi yg kena antar proposal for defense nnt by 1st September. Mati la aku! Cena neh? Mna da idea nak wat questionnaire, cena nak antar. Adeh! Pening plus sakit pala!

Prof, cena ni?!!! OMG......I'll be extremely busy until 1st September.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Thank you for being you

I didn’t know I was going to tell you like this
No words were enough
I couldn’t say anything
I was so thankful
I didn’t know what to do

Why do you like me
Why do you choose me among so many people
What I could do for you is so lacking
So I made this song for you

So I thank you
and I love you

I wasn’t able to do anything for you,
But you just keep on giving without stopping
Because of the love you gave me,
I’m standing here like this

I know how difficult it is
to live while loving me

But you keep standing in that place
without any change
Just for me

Why don’t you turn around
It must be so tiring for you, why do keep loving me
I didn’t know how to repay you again
So I made this song


That heart of yours,
The tears you cried,
All that, I won’t forget it.

So I thank you
And I love you


Did I ever regret loving you and do all the things I did only for you? There's no way I will feel that. To see you there standing so happily, that made my day and nothing, until the end that I would ever stop loving you and only you, the one I chose among so many people. And I love you too!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Wish list!

Kadang2 aku rasa lawak pun ada bila teringat pasal diri sendiri. Aku rasa aku ni pelik, pelik ke? Ntah, maybe la kot. Artis kegilaan sekarang..nak tgk?


Ha, ni la buah hati pengarang jantung aku sekarang, 2PM! Kompem2 la artis korea kan cik kak. Mesti org kata, ala perempuan, pantang nampak artis2 korea hensem cket, suma nak minat. Ai, suka ati la, yang ko nak sibok2 pehal plak, tak minat sudah! Minat sbb pa? Mula2 mmg terberkenan kat artis dia la kan, standard r tu, pastu baru dgr lagu, bleh tahan, aku suka! Tapi dalam byk2 artis korea lelaki, tak kira la solo ka band ka, aku leh minat sgt2 yg ni ngan FT Island je (bukan pulau faizal tahir ye nini). Y? Ntah, even ada lagi byk group2 korea yg artis dia lagi hensem and comei tapi takde chemistry ngan group len cam yang ni. Cewah! Poyo je aku ni cakap.....~


So, aku dah berangan2 sejak dgr cerita maybe dorang nak dtg Msia next year, yang aku nak g tgk konsert dorang walau berapa pun harga tiket tu nnt. Nak bagi present ape ek? Nnt kalo ada autographed session nak sain cd yg mna satu? Nak ckp pe bila jmpa? Angan2 tol Wanie! Nama pun fans kan.....janji aku bahagia ngan dorang and tak kaco org lain, ye x?




Yang lawaknya, aku pya genre favourite lagu mmg sgt2 la universal. Dari artis jiwang karat tahap dewa mmg meleleh pya sampai la tahap hardcore metal pya lagu pun aku layan. Aku pelik gak tgk aku ni. Cakap je lagu ape, penyanyi mana, melayu, cina, korea, jepun, omputih, hindustan, sepanyol, suma aku bedal ja janji aku suka. Cam lawak ja bila teringat yg aku suka lagu2 Avenged Sevenfold, tapi bleh g nak nyanyi hindustan. Haha, lawak tol aku neh! Cakap je ape, kuch kuch hota hai, mohabbatein, dilwale dulhania le jayenge, suma cek layan ja. Bak kata ayah aku, aku ni pendengar universal!


p/s: dah dapat idea nak bg present apa kat khun ngan taec ni nnt....hehe~

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Heaven!

Owh heaven gila duk kat umah ni! tiap2 ari leh bangun lambat, tak payah nak pkir nak kena wat keje, nak kena g keje, nak bukak posa makan ape, hoho...tapi kena gak blk shah alam, kampung kedua aku tu. Dah rehat sedap2, tiba masa nak kena balik wat keja cam besa.

Well, tak leh nak watpe la kan, byk keje menanti, defense of proposal plak pas raya, cena nak bagi setel pun tak tau la. Juz wait and see la kan. Hopefully everything ok! Rindu plak budak2 kat tuisyen tu, xpe2 esok kita jumpa ye wahai semua bdk2 kesayangan aku! Hehe! Hairi? Nizam? Haha....tak rindu langsung pun..~

Duk umah, heaven! Takde bnda nak citer....daa~

Friday, August 13, 2010

salam perkenalan to my new friend~

Hari ketiga berpuasa....seems ok, everything is on the track, nothing much, nothing extraordinary, just me and my study, my life and my part time work. I love my life now even more. Reading someone's journey in life makes me feel that I didn't thank enough in life, I didn't appreciate enough and didn't love enough. I have the best in everything. So what if you don't have a chance to study abroad? So what if you never been offered to medic? That problem is really nothing compared to this girl.

Aku bukan nak simpati dengan dia cuma aku rasa there's a lot I can learn from her. We're the same age but we're different. The way she views life, her life full of sadness, tears but she found her strength somehow. Sincerely, I hope I can be someone who can help her, to at least if I can't do anything, I can listen, hear what she wants to say, being a friend. Maybe I knew her from cyberspace, I barely knew her but I feel that we can be friend.

To mum and dad, I love you guys so much! Even though you guys always quarrel on the even simplest thing, nonsense things but you guys love each other so much and thank you for doing everything for us. To my brothers and sisters, I love you guys too.

Wanie, keep working hard!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Ramadhan datang lagi!

Dah lama tak update blog ni, rasanya cam byk je cerita nak bgtau tapi xpe la. Ni dah 1 Ramadhan, jadi kena buang benda2 tak elok tu. Kalo tak boleh buang tu ssh la kan, sbb bln ni semua syaitan2 dah kena ikat, jadi kalo jahat jugak tu mmg berjaya la syaitan tu train kita selama ni ye. Renung2kan dan selamat beramal!

Hehe...ok first story, housemate aku merangkap salah sorang bestie aku, dah blk kampung mlm tadi. Posa kat umah...waa! Aku pun nak blk kedah jugak! Tapi takpe, turn aku sampai tak lama lagi. Minggu dpn, the whole week aku cuti bersama keluarga. Sedih dowh, dah la kat umah sewa shah alam ni roomate ramai yang blk, yg ada pun non-Muslim. Tapi takpe, org kata dugaan semua tu. So ari ni, bkk posa pun aku tak terasa nak pergi bazar ramadan, nak masak pun mls, jwbnya bkk ngan megi je la ye Wanie.

Arini cuti. Tak keje kat kedai fotostat, dh gtau ngan bos tapi kena duk library sampai petang sbb nak repair proposal yang prof baru tanda aritu. Kalo tak amik cuti, mmg tak jalan la proposal tu, kompem! Tetiba aku rasa diri ni berwibawa la plak, ye lah, tiap2 ari kul 8 je dah ade kat fakulti ni. Tiap2 ari k, bukan satu dua ari je! Dulu time degree pun xde camni. Hahaha....poyo tul aku ni. Sebenarnya sbb nak cari parking, xnk jalan jauh2, sbb tu kna bgn awal. Bulan posa ni lagi senang la gamaknya.

Akhirnya, professor oversea pakar branding tu reply gak emel aku, siap attachkan dia pya research journal yang aku mintak tu. Thanx ye prof byk2, nnt dtg M'sia saya belanja nasi lemak. Hehe...makan ke?

K la, penat dah aku menaip kat blog ni. Nak baca paper plak, update general knowledge la katakan..hehe....

Daa~~

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Happy Birthday sis!



Happy birthday to my dearest little sister, ari 5hb, genap la 11 tahun kan dik....being the youngest in the family, jadi perangai tu kdg2 mengada sampai over the top la jgk. Hehehe....tapi my mum said she look and behave a lot like I did, well, dat's a good news mum, u'll have another nice daughter! Haha....



K la, akak wish u a very happy birthday and miss you! Jangan wat mak tu pening pale ngan perangai ko dik, hehe.....

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Hardcore dedicated fans~

Lama rasanya tak update blog ni, bkn ape, xde idea nak tulis apa, plus broadband yang mmg cam beruk, jadi masuk kampus baru bleh berbelog ni sambil membaca2, belog2 org lain. Org duk library stadi, aku, hehe....tiap2 ari datang library, siap tercangak kat depan library tunggu pakcik library tu bagi aku masuk. Gila dowh, best student r aku kali ni!

Sebenarnya datang awal sbb takut takde parking, pastu bosan xde tempat nak lepak. Beli la paper, tnggu library bukak then, bukak laptop on9.....dah penat, blk. Hohoho, best student la sgt aku ni. Anyway, kesian semalam budak2 aku kena tengking sebab Kak Ju (owner pusat tuisyen) cakap, suh expalain kat semua bdk2, tengking je, jangan takut sbb dorang ni gila hardcore pya bdk, muka selamba, tak makan saman, suke main2, jadi aku cuma menjalankan tugas je la kan.

Tapi tengking tu xde la melampau sgt, suruh dorang diam, pandang depan je. Pastu duk ngan dorang explain slow2, lembut2, tanya byk kali pun cikgu ni tak marah, xpe, sbb awak xphm kn. Cikgu ni xde kuasa la nak marah2 korang, penat tau x. Tapi jgn la main2, dengar bila orang ajar. Tak paham bleh tya, jgn bising. 20 kali awak tya pun, cikgu ni cakap lembut2 lagi.

Aku kat tuisyen tu mmg diberi tugas mem'brush'kan budak2 hardcore yang mmg memerlukan kesabaran yang tinggi disamping kebolehan menerang sesimple yang mungkin, plus kena tegas. Tapi setakat ni, aku enjoy keje situ walaupun penat.

K la, kena g keje kedai fotostat plak. Cari rezeki dowh! Bye!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I love you teacher

Another update!

i just read in a paper that former students celebrate teacher's 91st birthday! Wow! And they are already late 60s and 70s. And now, who did that? I myself never even remember my high school teachers birthday, not even one of them and it just 4 5 years since I left the school. And yet I still think that I'm a good student. Haha!

It seems like we have a lot to learn from the elders, we did not respect enough, did not appreciate enough and that makes us a person who takes things too easily. Hey, teachers is what made us today. Hey you, doc, you're not gonna be doctor if your teacher didn't thought you that blood is red and you sir engineer, you can never be an engineer if your teacher didn't thought that house is made from brick, and you mr. so-smart architecture would not be one if you're teacher didn't show you how to draw a simple so childish house. So, respect your teacher, and always...always appreciate them.

Who needs Teachers Day if they are a lot of these people exist now??? Sadly we need one, because we don't have any other students like them left.